Single Parent

Single parents, I do not know how you do it; or did it!

After having Rebekah, Shelly told me she had an opportunity to attend some training at the Humana home office in Kentucky and participate in some conferences around the country. Having taken a couple of months off for maternity leave I told her she should "jump in feet first" and do as much as she can to enjoy her fairly new job. She took my words to heart and has hardly been home the last couple of months. Currently she is in Boston attending a conference, she will be home Sunday for a few hours before leaving again for San Diego.

Last month she was at a week long seminar in Kentucky when the kids all got the flu. I was holding newborn Rebekah in one arm standing over some towels so she could throw up on them and holding a crying Rachel in the other. Liam wanted to sleep in Emma's new bunk bed (top bunk of course) and ended up throwing all over her and her bed. He changed his clothes and went out to the living room to watch TV without waking me up, what a great guy, although Emma got sick from sleeping in his puke all night. It was a very draining week for me, and Shelly who was worried about us, jumped on a flight and came home early.

With all that said let me go back to my original statement, "Single parents I do not know how you do it!" I have a new respect for you all, especially my mom. She always said that there is a special place in heaven for the mothers of boys! Boy is she right. I don't know how she did it (and I only have 1 boy) all the while working and going to school to become a nurse. I cannot remember my mother getting angry at us, although she says whenever she tried to break up a fight or argument we would unite against her, so there was not a lot of discipline. She also still managed to take us to church every Sunday without killing us during services. The three of us turned out to be pretty great guys without a lot of animosity towards our parents for their parental mistakes.

When Shelly is home there is a little (very little) piece of the evening after she comes home where I can catch my breath and then the two of us take care of the family and house together. I am not the greatest homemaker, although I guess I do have that label, but I try and allow Shelly the time she needs after a hard days work to unwind without the children driving her crazy. With her gone and without that small amount of time to catch my breath and without her assistance in the evening, I find I get frustrated easy, the house doesn't get clean, I feel upset that I do not have any time for myself, and then I feel like a lousy parent. Being a school teacher and having parent-teacher conferences I have seen my share of bad parents. I've had strippers and prostitute parents, and been told I cannot send home troublemakers because they will be around violence and gang banger family members. I know I am not a bad parent, in fact I have been told many times how great I am with kids. I know my kids love me, but there is always the worry that will this split second decision be the one that haunts my kid forever.

Single parents: I respect you!

My wife: please don't ever leave me (at least for more than a week at a time)!